Day 28:365 Gratitude Challenge and April 16th A to Z Challenge
Today I am grateful for all the nice people who have come into my life since I embarked upon my blogging journey.
Dear Nice People,
Hey, it’s just little old me, the one who started blogging in earnest only a few short months ago. The one who has so much to say but lacks the confidence to say it. The one who is passionate about writing but doesn’t think she is talented enough to do it. The one who thinks everyone else is creative but herself. The one who has that little voice going off in her head whispering “you’re just not good enough”.
Yeah, that’s me. My insecurities for all the world to see. But thanks to you nice people I am getting better. I am getting stronger, braver and more confident. I am beginning to believe in myself, my abilities, my creativity, my passion. I am beginning to learn that there is a whole other side to me whom I am just beginning to let out of her shell.
You nice people are just the best. You have embraced little old me without even knowing who the real me is. You have encouraged me with your comments, your cyber hugs and your love. You have laughed along with me and not at me, something that is foreign to me. When I gave you a little peak into my world (“L is for Laughter“), you didn’t start running the other way; instead, you stood up and cheered me on. Bravo! Bravo! Bravo! I know this because I felt it; I felt it in my heart with every flitter it took upon reading your comments.
In the world where I come from, I never felt I was good enough. I always felt like I was the problem and, if I could just do better and be better, maybe the madness would stop. Maybe the mental illness would stop. Maybe the drinking would stop. Maybe they would notice that who stood before them was a really good little girl who just wanted to be loved. That’s all. Pure, simple and unconditional love.
That said, I have learned and continue to learn that my definition of family is what I create for myself. Family isn’t always biological. Family comes from those I choose to be in my life. And I choose you nice people. Hopefully, that works for you because it sure does work for me. Thank you for that.
Thanks to my husband and my sons and now you nice people, I am truly becoming me. And I don’t think that little old me is all that bad. I think that I am kind of starting to like myself. Who knew that was even possible? But here I am, proof that it is possible. All things are possible with the right kind of nice people.
So, thank you nice people for coming along and helping me feel so darned good about myself and for making me need my dammit doll less and less each day. Also, thank you for cancelling out all the assholes in my life with your niceness, not an easy feat, let me tell you. You will be happy to know that I find myself having less and less inside thoughts about the said assholes in my life. So, thank you for that, too.
And, just so you know, the next round of jelly beans is on me.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Nice People: 1
PS.: Don’t forget to wear your clean knickers just in case you are in an accident on the way to the Jelly Bean Party. Just sayin’.
PSS: And to all the assholes out there ….